How much I'm really eating...

Woke up and weight 144.5, same as yesterday.  I guess that's not too bad given that I haven't taken a dump since Sunday or Monday (TMI, I know).  Thing is, this morning I felt like it should have been less.  I didn't feel "heavy".  But it made me start thinking about what I really ate yesterday, calorie-wise and I didn't find anything that makes me think my weight gain has been for any reason other than just eating too much.  Looking at the details shows kind of a different thing than looking at it in aggregate.

In aggregate - I eat veggies and protein at pretty much every meal.  I don't eat a whole lot of inherantly unhealthy food. 

In detail - I stuff food into my face pretty much constantly.  I don't often really feel hungry.  I've made a habit of getting a cooking in the post-lunch doldrums (and do some disordered eating of it).  I don't drink nearly enough water (gonna go get some right now, now that I think about it).  I regularly eat 5 meals a day so if each of those has a 100 calories more than I "count", I'm over by quite a bit, even if those 100 calories come from whole, unprocessed food. 

So today I decided to write down everything I eat.  Nothing fancy like an iPhone app, just pen and paper.  The results so far (its just after lunch) are enlightening if not surprising.

M1:  Berry smoothie
S1:  Turkey, brown rice and peanut butter while making my lunch ("I'm in the fridge anyway")  (150 calories)
S2:  Last Rolo in Cynthia's candy jar (30 calories)
S3:  Chips and Edamame on my way to cafeteria (100 calories)
M2:  Strawberry, granola, yogurt parfait
S4:  Chips and edamame on way to get lunch out of fridge (100 calories)
M3:  Turkey and vegetables, apple

So I can see that it isn't even so much that I'm eating big helpings of bad stuff.  It's that I'm eating so many calories-worth so mindlessly, without even thinking about how they add up.  380 so far today, without any need to or enjoyment from doing so.  Just stinkin' habit. 

On sort of a similar note, there was a Precision Nutrition blog post that struck a chord with me today.  It was about decluttering your mind to pay attention to only what is really important.  Don't get distracted by every thing your read or hear.  Filter it before deciding whether its relevant and important. 

I think I got away from that a little bit relative to my eating habits.  I think, in fact, that Precision Nutrition was a contributor to the clutter.  I was looking for something other than "you're eating too much" to be the answer to my weight gain.  Adding that clutter seems to have only made things worse.  Advocating nut butters and flavored protein etc. etc. only added to my mental idea that there was something I could eat that would make me thin - when it's exactly the opposite (what you don't eat makes you thin) and that if I eat too much but eat all the macro-nutrients at the right time I'll somehow end up thin also. 

So, I'm going to go back to the basic basics.  Got rid of the nut butters from the fridge.  Will not fool myself that some "anytime" concoction that has lots of calories (but the right macronutrient distribution) is somehow a better snack for me than a piece of fruit or a hard boiled egg.

And we'll go from there.

Hanging tough

Kicking ass apparently doesn't always show up on the scale.  Yesterday I did everything right.  Ran two miles, worked out hard with Josue, ate clean, drank water and went to bed early.  Despite all that the scale said 144.5 this morning. 

Taking a lesson from the "what should you do when the scale isn't what you want" book, I got up this morning and went to swing class then ran 3 miles at Axis before going to work.  We did a load of squats at class so running didn't feel all that good but I got it done.  My thinking at the time was that I'd run around the block this evening for a good double.

Ended up taking a chunk of the afternoon off just to burn the vacation.  Then did another kettlebell workout in the living room while I watched the Tivo of Nadal in the French Open.  45 minutes (or so) of 1:1 work to rest.  Some 15 second sets, some 30 second sets and some 1 minute long sets.  What I did prove is that I'm not in shape for swinging the 24kg - my grip didn't like even doing the 10 sets of 10 swings.  That should be relatively easy to work through.  Just need to do it.

This would be a good one to do with Rhonda if I can convince her that 40 minutes of swings is a good workout:

• 20 sets of :15/:15 with 12kg for warmup (2hd, tr, 1sw/1tr/2sw/tr, 5R/5L, 10R, 10L)
• 10 sets of :15/:15 with 24kg
• 5 sets of :30/:30 with 12 kg done 2hd swing + :15 of added on progression
• 10 sets of :15/:15 with 16kg (felt good on this)
• 5 sets of :30/:30 done :15 progression + 2 hd swing
• 3 x :60/:60 roundabouts with 12kg
• 2 x :60/:60 snatch/transfer
• 2 x :60:60 roundabout with 16kg

What I deserve now is a glass of wine...

Good news, finally

Well it isn't really good news but it isn't bad news.  This morning I weighed 143.0.  Admittedly it isn't where I want to be but it is the best I've seen in a couple of week.  And it's headed in the right direction.

Yesterday I focused on making sure I wasn't taking in too many "forgotten" calories.  I still did some not so smart eating (spoonfuls of nut butter, hard candy at manicure, etc.) but I was at least aware of it and I tried not to do too much of it. 

A few more ridiculisms became apparent as well:

• What you eat at the Farmer's Market doesn't count
• If you spoon the nut butter of the edges of the jar rather than the middle, it doesn't count

Funny how when you eat better and keep yourself hydrated, your body is better fueled and feels more energetic.  Had some good workout time yesterday.  A 3 mile run (with Clancy) in the morning, 45 minutes of backyard 'bells (450 calories), 3 miles on the treadmill at Oracle and then 20x50m on the minute in the Oracle pool. 

This morning was workout with Josue, which went really well.  I just kept cranking away at what he asked me to do.  I was wearing my HRM but it shut off at 17 minutes.  Up to that point I had burned 144 calories and that was the easy part of the workout.  So I'm guessing I was at about 450 for that workout as well. 

I'm hoping to get a run in later today (either treadmill or with Clancy, depends on the weather) but we'll see how that goes.

Kicking ass feels good!

Awareness - revisited

It's funny how once you become aware of something, it can slap you in the face so hard that you wonder why you didn't notice it before.  It was sort of that way for me yesterday.  After my mid-workout epiphany about eating too much, I was became aware of all the calories I was eating that I wasn't really "counting". 

• Several hundred calories of cookies and bread at Whole  Foods
• Substantial amount of nut butter straight from fridge to spoon
• Calorie rich veggies like beets, sweet potatoes, etc. - sure  they are veggies - but they've got calories!
• Bites here and there while waiting on other things to cook
• Milk in my coffee and coffee-like beverages

I doubt anyone would look at what I ate yesterday (except maybe the Whole Foods stuff) and say I have a terrible diet.  Even I wouldn't go that far.  But I would bet that I eat enough stuff that I'm not counting to add up to the weight gain I've seen over the past 6 months (about 6-8 pounds).  If you think about it, gaining a pound a month only requires eating an extra 100 calories a day.  Certainly possible given the list above.  If you think about it, NONE of the stuff above was in my diet when I was running lean, immediately following my first purification. 

I think that's a meaningful correlation.  Meaningful enough to do something about. 

On the other hand, it also seems that once you think you've put your finger on why you've gained weight, your weight goes down.  Maybe not fat loss but just enough scale-based weight loss for Mother Nature (or whoever runs this stuff) to remind you who is boss.

Today's Measurements:


Weight = 143.5
Chest = 37"
Waist = 29" (relaxed)  (-1 inch)
Hips = 37" (-1 inch)
Thigh = 22.0"
Love handles = 34"

Some of the variation in the measurements from last time could be due to my taking them immediately when I got up - before eating or drinking anything.  But the weight, while the same as 3 weeks ago, is lower than I've seen during those three weeks. 

Probably just luck - but I'm (re)fired up to make it a trend.  Hope the motivation lasts.

Taking responsibility

This morning, as I was in the middle of a god-awful, ass-kicking Max VO2 workout, the thought crossed my mind that the reason my weight is going up rather than down is because I'm eating too much.  Rocket science, right?  Maybe, maybe not.  It's been my theory for a while that I've been gaining weight either because I've got hormonal issues I'm fighting (the "M" word) or because I'm not eating enough.  If one were to read a whole bunch of stuff on the web, specifically Precision Nutrition, you might feel justified in concluding that weight gain is because you aren't eating enough.  But what if I'm not really being honest with myself about (or accurate in computing) how much I'm eating?  Certainly an interesting thought - especially when I realize I haven't felt "hungry" in quite a while.

So, for the next couple of weeks, I'm going to take a slightly different approach to things.  Rather than eating all I can of things that are "compliant", I'm going to try to keep the calories under control.  Then we'll see what happens. 

But as for ass-kicking, this morning was that and more.

Max VO2 at :45/:15.  So snatch Right, swing, then Snatch Left.  Basically your basic max VO2 with a swing class embedded in the middle instead of rest.  It was a challenge, to say the list.  But I got it done and felt pretty good about it.  HRM said 30 minutes of average heartrate = 150, peak = 176 and minimum = 135. 

Then a swing class where we also did :45/:15.  Lots of work.  Not much rest.  Average heartrate of 130 for about 40 minutes.

Then a 4.5 mile run on the treadmill at Axis.

That, is kicking ass.

Update (5:15pm) - as part of running my errands and getting a (really, really good) massage, I went to Whole Foods to pick up a few things.  While there I had some samples of bread and cookies, probably 300 calories or maybe more.  It was easy to get that many quickly, without really thinking about it or realizing it.  Time to take responsibility for that.  There it is, my afternoon snack.

Catch up (and a day off)

Friday afternoon and time to catch up on the week. 

Summary of week:  I'm back.  I still have a residual sniffle and a bug of phlegm but overall I feel much better.  Most importantly, my energy level is back close to normal, whatever that is at this point. 

On Tuesday evening I did an extra swing workout (45 minutes) just because after my run, I got going while watching "One Nation Overweight" on TV.  On Wednesday morning I did a run and then did another swing workout (40 minutes).  It just felt good to get in a groove and swing the 12kg and 16kg over and over.  At the end, I quit because I thought I should, not because I really wanted to or needed to.  Last night I had a good workout with Josue.  I was sweating like a pig and suspect that I burned a bunch of calories but I didn't have my HRM on. 

Today I am taking an intentional day off.  Sometimes I end up taking a day off because the day just runs out before I get any exercise in.  But even as early as last night I was thinking that it would be good to take a proactive day off.  I think I've done some sort of workout (in addition to running) every day this month.  Hopefully the day off will help me have a good workout tomorrow rather than making me stiff (the squats I've been doing on Friday evenings seem to have been helping but I don't really have anything to compare to).  I think tonight's even going to be a wine drinking evening.  Not much, but a little something to relax and get out of the routine.

Still no good movement on my weight.  I've been in the 144-145 range all week.  My eating has been clean with the exception of chips at work.  Axis is going to be doing a weight loss challenge through the summer so I'll get some Josue help on the weight loss front.  I think maybe this weekend I'll do a bit of research on "metabolism repair" to understand what that would mean.  Something just isn't right given what I'm eating vs. what I'm burning.  Either my metabolism is messed up or my hormones are totally changed in a not good way.   We'll see.

Anyway, hoping I'm kicking ass tomorrow morning.  Not planning to do so this evening.

World's best personal trainer?

With all due respect to Josue and Tracy, both of whom have been awesome trainers for me, I have to say that Clancy is the hands-down winner as best personal trainer for me.  Without even trying, with every workout she reminds me of some very important things.

• 
  
  When the opportunity presents itself, go for a run.  Don't worry about whether today is supposed to be a rest day or you need 6 more miles to get to a weekly total of 30 or whether you've eaten right today.  If someone is willing to take you, go - with enthusiasm.
• 
  
  Stretch before running.  The attached picture is Clancy's immediate (and always) reaction to me getting my running clothes on.  She also drinks water immediately following each run - walks in the back door and slurps up a bunch of water. 

• Feel the joy. Clancy doesn't think about each run as "exercise", "workout", "calorie burn" or anything other than just "play". She sees it as an opportunity to get out, breathe some fresh air, stretch some muscles and spend time with me. I'd venture to say that she never feels like she "has to" go running but rather she "gets to" go out and play.
• It's better to poop in someone else's yard. Even if Meg has to then pick it up.
• When you're done, relax.  You deserve it.

And after all, she is my (very) "personal" trainer.

Comeback time

Its seems that sometimes you have to go through the "not feeling so good" so that you can really appreciate how good it feels when it does feel good.  I'm going through that a bit right now as I recover from my cold/sinus infection.  I'm not all the way back just yet (still have some stuffiness and runny nose) but I fell like my energy levels are starting to recover.  And my attitude is definitely improved.

Or maybe this has nothing to do with my cold/sinus infection and my improved attitude is leading to my energy levels being improved.  Who's to say?

All I know is that yesterday's workout with Josue felt pretty good.  Then this morning, I woke up at 5:05 (still needed the alarm clock) and I was excited about going to swing class.  I even got there 5 minutes early and do some warm-up swings just because I felt good.  During the class, I felt good pushing myself.  I squatted with the 16kg, I snatched when the opportunity presented and I was surprised when the class was finished.  I felt like I was just getting warmed up.  Heartrate monitor said that I burned 500 calories, not counting the warmup stuff.

Mentally this morning's workout is what I wish all my workouts could feel like.  I had enough energy to focus on the workout, not the clock and how much time I had left.  I was able to really "feel" the hip snap in my swing, the legs in my snatch and the flow in the swing/snatch.  Even in the squats (and I did a bunch of them) I was able to feel the "stretch" (maybe just my pants) in the bottom position and then a few times I really felt a smooth "press" up rather than a "push".  Not every squat felt good but there were some good ones in the mix, the 12 kg felt easy and the 16kg didn't cause my form to break.  I'll take it.

This morning's weight was 145.5, which is up yet again this week.  Today felt different, however.  Rather than being upset at that weight and frustrated because it's up again, I felt more calm about it.  So be it, that's what it is now.  My mental state was more one of, "that's what it is now but because I feel good about working out and I'm focused on healthy eating to fuel those workouts, it'll take care of itself."  Boy, do I hope that feeling lasts. 

Right now, I'll just go with it.  Note to self that the following is a great workout pattern (can accommodate pretty much anything including ladders, progressions, etc.).  7.5 minutes total per round.

• 30 seconds work/30 seconds rest
• 60 seconds work/30 seconds rest
• 90 seconds work/30 seconds rest
• 120 seconds work/30 seconds rest

Almost feel ready to kick ass again.

Mo mojo

Weight = 145.0

It's not good as far as the weight goes but I'm starting to feel more like myself again.  I'm starting to feel like moving for the sake of moving.

Feels like somewhere along the line I lost sight of enjoying exercise for the joy of moving with food as the means to fuel that movement.  Exercise became something I did so that I could eat and food was something to drive me crazy.

So my goal for next few weeks (or as long as I can), I'm going to focus on the joy of what my body can do and how I fuel it.  I need to also focus on getting enough rest and recovery.  We'll see where that takes us because what I've been doing certainly hasn't been working.

Exercise - ran 1 mile in the am, then worked out with Josue.  This evening I took Clancy for a spin around the block.

Food:
M1:  berry shake
M2:  strawberry, yogurt, granola parfait
M3:  root veggies, beef and an apple
M3.5:  (Disordered) oatmeal cookie
M4:  hard boiled egg and cherries
M5:  salad with beans, cauliflower and quinoa.  Sugar-free jello (times 3)
Mx:  butterscotch (times 4), nut butter

Not measurements and pictures

Today is Sunday and its the every other Sunday that I'm supposed to be posting pictures and measurements.  I'm not doing that tonight because one or both of the following are true:

1. The mirror in my bathroom hasn't been installed and I said I would take my next batch of pictures in my new bathroom. 
2. I'm heavier than I was two weeks ago and since there is no reason to think that I've had body composition changes, it would only be depressing and not inspiring.

Weight yesterday:  144.0
Weight today:  144.5

Yesterday was snatches, swings and a four mile treadmill run.  Today was a three mile run in the morning, then Zach's birthday party.  In the afternoon, I did a backyard swing workout.  It felt great!  I got into a zone and could have kept going for a long time but I had to finish up so I could go get a massage.  I'm not sure if I'm just feeling better and finally getting over my cold/sinus thing or if it's something more fundamental about getting back to the joy of movement.

The swings went something like this (sort of lost track):

• :15/:15 for 10 minutes (2hd swings, transfers, swing/transfers)
• 5 rounds of :60/:30 rotation with the 12kg
• 2.5 minutes combination with the 12kg
• 5 rounds of :30/:30 rotation with the 16kg
• 2.5 minutes combination with the 12kg
• 5 rounds of :60/:30 rotation with the 12kg
• 2.5 minutes combination with the 12kg
• 5 rounds of :30/:30 rotation with the 16kg
• 2.5 minutes of snatch/transfer with the 12kg plus 5R/5L snatches (for 50 total)

HRM said 400 calories, not counting the warmup.

That puts another $20 into the "be your own trainer" fund for a current total of $120.

Finally Friday....

Weight = 145.5

Funny how I can feel "good" about such a big number.  Intellectually, there is no way that is good.  But when I got up in the morning, I felt better than I had in quite a few days - less bloated, more in control.  Just better.  So after only only day, I am optimistic that getting back to higher carb, lower fat eating (eliminating nut butter and dairy) is something that might work for me.

Today was the day I was going to call and make a doctor appointment related to this sinus/head congestion thing I've been fighting.  I didn't actually do it, but I think maybe the congestion is starting to break up.   If it isn't considerably better by Monday, I'll go ahead and make the appointment.

I also quite proud of myself because, for the second Friday in a row, I came home from work and did "the right thing" (running and kbs) instead of plopping on the couch in front of the TV.  I took Clancy for a spin around the block and then did the following:

at :30/:30, with 12kg
10 rounds of (2 HD swing, 10 snatch R, 10 snatch L, 10 goblet squats) = 40 minutes total

That's another $20 in the "training myself" account.  Being a good trainer to myself, however, I have to say that I should be doing a workout like the above with the 16kg.  I'm doing it at home so failure is okay (just me here to know about it).  And snatching the 16kg at home will make the 12kg workouts with Tracy that much easier.  I was telling myself that I'd have used the 16kg except I didn't want to wear myself out before my Saturday workout.  Maybe there was some truth in that excuse but it was still and excuse.  I'll have to balance the reality that using the 16kg might, at least initally, make the workout less fun.  Something to think about.

Meals were again okay.  The habit of the disordered bakery snack after lunch needs to stop.  It's disordered.  It's expensive.  It's destructive to the othe good nutritional habits I'm working on . I know that it is a result of boredom and a desire to get out of my office.  If I could just harness that same feeling to get myself over to the fitness center, it'd be turning a negative to a positive.

M1:  berry shake
M2:  omelette with veggies
M3:  snap peas, cauliflower, and chicken/beef.  apple
M3.5:  (disordered) snickerdoodle
M4:  hard boiled egg
M5:  rice, salad w/ brussel sprouts, cauliflower, asparagus and beef.  Frozen berries. 
Mx:  2 butterscotch candies and a (rather large) nip of nut butter

Need to do more work with the stick.   I can feel it in my legs....

Down a pound...

...to 145.5.  Never thought that'd look good.  But at least today I didn't gain a pound like I have for each of the past several days.

I didn't do my kettlebell burn yesterday.  I had done 12 days in a row of workouts and I think I was just getting too warn down.  I decided to take a day off (except for running).  Fell asleep at 8:45pm and slept until 6am.  I may do more KB Burn workouts, and I will continue to pay myself $20 per workout, but I need to have at least one non-workout day per week.

Today was workout with Josue.  Didn't feel especially good but didn't feel bad either.  I'm not sure whether I've got a sinus infection or just a lingering cold.  Then ran on the treadmill for about 3 miles (total = 3.5).

M1:  Berry shake
M2:  Egg white omelette with veggies
M3:  Stir fried cabbage and peas, apple
M3.5:  (disordered) peanut butter cookie
M4:  Hard boiled egg, apple
M5:  Salad w/ bs&c, snap peas, frozen veggies, 1 tsp almond butter

Morning after

Weight = 146.5

Unbelievable.  I've "gained" 3 pounds in 3 days.  Now I realize that I can't actually gain 3 pounds of fat in three days.  I've probably not eaten a whole lot more than 4000 calories over the past three days.  Much less an EXCESS of 10,500 calories.

It's time to admit that what I've been doing isn't working.  I need to change something up.  I haven't been perfect in my eating but I have been generally pretty good and I've been exercising.  So I'm going to go back to what was working for me last spring.  Taking the nut butters and the dairy (except milk in my gano cafe) out and making sure that I put some rice or quinoa in.  Will also make sure that I get the fluids in. 

Food Plan (and actual)

M1:  Berry shake
M2:  Yogurt/granola/strawberry parfait (couldn't wait for eggs, didn't finish all the yogurt)
M3:  Root veggies, beans and chicken.  Red apple.
M4:  (disordered) lemon poppyseed scone edges - eaten out of boredom at work
M4:  Hard boiled egg.  Granny smith apple.
M5:  Salad w/ bs&c, rice, green peppers and protein (chicken or beef, not yet decided), frozen fruit

This morning I went back to the morning runs.  Despite needing to be at work at 8am, I took Clancy around the block. 

We'll see how things work under the new plan.  If that doesn't work, then I'll need to consider whether a detox is in order.

No comment

Weight = 145.0.  No comment.
Swing class in the morning.  500 calories burned.

M1:  berry shake
M2:  strawberry/granola/yogurt parfait
M3:  mixed veggies and chicken, apple
M4:  peanut butter & chocolate protein "cookie"
Mx:  2 glasses of wine, one piece of calamari, 1 piece of pita bread w/ cheese
M5:  salad w/ beans, root veggies and chicken; 5 strawberries, pb&protein "cookie"

'nuf said.

Ugh

Monday morning.  Weight =  145.0.  Workout with Josue felt awful.  I just don't get it.  I'm tired of thinking about why I can't lose the weight.  And it's making it impossible for me to do pull-ups because I can't get my fat ass off the ground.

Eating today:
M1:  Berry shake
M2:  Yogurt, granola, strawberry parfait
M3:  Root vegetables and chicken.  Apple
M4:  Peanut butter, flax and chocolate protein "cookie"
M5:  Chinese veggies, chicken, brown rice with soy sauce.  Frozen berries.
Extras:  2 hard candies at work, a few nips of nut butter, 2 bits of oatmeal, a spoon of greek yogurt and a butterscotch candy.

Workout:  Ran 1 mile and Josue training in the morning.  Ran 3 miles with Clancy in the evening.

Nothing more to say.  Too frustrated.

What happened to the weekend?

Got up about this morning, weight = 143.5, and pretty much started doing "stuff".  I didn't feel like swimming so I didn't.  Maybe it was the weather.  Maybe it was because I wasn't quite ready to go at 6:45.  But I was determined that I wasn't going to end up wasting the day away.  So about 7:45am Clancy and I headed out for a 3.5 mile run.  Then I did my kettlebell burn workout (and burn it did - see below).  Then to the farmers market.  Then some breakfast and cooking.  Then mani/pedi.  Then lunch.  Then rug shopping and grocery shopping.  Then mowing the lawn.  Then finally dinner.  The laundry is still going.  Ugh.  How does anyone ever get everything done?

I had a bit of a revelation this morning while Clancy and I were out for our run.  I was feeling pretty good about being 143.5 when I got up this morning.  I ate well yesterday, exercised alot and drank lots and lots of water.  So I felt like it was a good 143.5 - not dehydrated or in huge food debt.  But while we were running, something in my head kept repeating "but 143.5 is soooo far from the 137 you want to be".  And it made me wonder whether I felt so good last spring because I was losing weight or whether I was losing weight because I felt so good.  Why the focus on the negative?  Why not just say "yes, you are doing the right stuff and it's working slowly but surely"?

I also realised during my run that running is my meditation.  So I guess if you call Josue my "psychological help" and call Tracy's workouts "entertainment", maybe I am doing the real kettlebell burn afterall.

And I realized I need to use my roller stick more often, particularly on my calves....

So hears how the KB Burn workout (B) went today:

• Presses - 11 ladders of 1-2-3 R/L plus 4 extra presses.  #1 and #6 were with the 16kg, others were with the 12kg.  The 4 extra presses were where ladder #11 would have been but I didn't have the full ladder in me (did 1-1-1-1 instead). 
• Getup situps and reverse lunges - 6 or 7 rounds with the 12 kg. 
• Swings - 10 minutes of :30/:30 with the 16kg.

Meals:

• M1 = berry shake
• M2 = brussel sprouts and cauliflower omelette, 4 strawberries
• M3 = cabbage stir-fry with beans and asparagus, root veggies, 1/2 apple, "mostly oatmeal cookie"
• M4 = munchies while shopping at Whole Foods, part of a Myoplex bar
• M5 = salad with chicken/bs&c/snap peas, 1/2 apple

Non-meals - a few "tastes" of almond butter and peanut butter, a few (4) butterscotch candies.

Rockin' snatches

Today's Weight = 144.5.
Frustration! I really don't get why my weight doesn't move.

Of course, thinking back to yesterday's eating - which included a morning glory bar (disordered), m&m's, diet coke, twizzler, cupcake (disordered), and pb & protein "bar" mix at night - its pretty clear why my weight didn't move (or moved up) over the past day. Carb water retention, if not caloric excess.

This week I'm going to try to DRINK WATER to both clear up my cold and hopefully expedite some weight loss.

Today's snatch workout was as good as I've had in quite a while.  I think the squats from last night had my hamstrings and glutes fired up to do work.   So the snatches were really firing from my legs and hips so they didn't feel like too much work.  Same thing carried over into the swing class that followed.  I need to remember that feeling and continue to push my swings.  I think I'd gotten lazy on the swings and that started to carry over.  So I have to remember to "swing with abandon". 

Today's workout was Max VO2 (:15/:15).  Ten sets each of 8 reps, 9 reps, 10 reps and 11 reps.  Between each round was 5 sets of 10 swings with the 16kg.  Then, at the end we did 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 14, 13, 12, 11 swings per set.  That killed my forearms.  Throbbing, aching, can't pick up a towel kind of hurt.  Then we did another ten minutes of MVO2 with 8 snatches per :15 but instead of putting the bell down between sets we held it overhead.  Wasn't as bad as it sounds (for me anyway, because I have very good shoulder flexibility). 

Then swing class with a roundabout ladder (increasing one hand swings), some 16kg roundabout minutes and some 12kg snatch roundabout minutes. 

Then running at Axis.  Only did 3 miles because I had errands that had to get done so that I could get to JITC by 11:30am.  Felt good and probably would have gone further if I'd had the time. 

HRM said MVO2 was 550 calories, swing was 400 calories, running was 300 calories.  (or thereabouts - I don't remember exactly)

Meals were good:
M1:  Berry shake
M1.5:  Surge recovery drink (3 small scoops)
M2:  Cauliflower/peas/chicken, apple, 1 twizzler
M3:  Peanut butter and chocolate protein "bar"
M4:  Greek yogurt w/ peanut butter and berries, carrot, dill pickle
M5:  Cabbage/beans/asparagus stir fry, 2 butterscotch candies
M6:  Plain yogurt with blueberries and strawberries

Got some good stuff done today too - picked up bathroom light fixture and got a facial.  Tomorrow is mani/pedi and more chores and errands.  And of course, another kettlebell burn workout.

On my way back...

I had a pretty good (would say "great" but it was with lighter weights) workout with Josue last night.  Afterwards, I ran a solid 3 miles on the treadmill.  I felt as good as I've felt since I got sick.  Then this morning Clancy and I took a spin around the block.  So hopefully I'm on my way to full recovery - although my ears and head are still quite congested.

 

It wasn't a stellar eating day.  Mexican for lunch (with Carole) and the edges of a cookie as I left for the afternoon.  That's a bit disordered.  Followed that with a Diet Coke later in the afternoon.  But dinner was good (salad with cauliflower, peas and chicken followed by fruit). 

 

Weight this morning = 143.5.

 

Hope to get my KB Burn workout in this evening.  It will take some discipline to get it done because I may get home a bit late from JITC.  I'm more likely to persevere if it is still light out and I can do it outside.  I just hope that doing it too late doesn't mess me up for tomorrow's workout-fest.

 

UPDATE:

 

Didn't get home from JITC stuff until about 6:30pm but I proceeded immediately to my KBB workout.  I knew that I couldn't dawdle or think about it too much or I wouldn't get it done.  On the way home, my mind was messing with me and trying to convince me that I should go for a run instead.  No, I committed to the workouts and I need to do the workouts.  I did concede a bit and used the 12kg instead of the 16kg.  I was curious about how that would impact the calorie burn and I didn't want to burn my shoulders too much before the Saturday workouts.   So that is a week of workouts done.  15 weeks to go.  And $60 in the "train myself" pool.  (think maybe I'll take $20 out for every workout I miss, if that ever happens)

Here's how it went

• 15 minutes of TGU's with 12kg (34 getups)
• 10 rounds of 8 squat, 7 right row, 7 left row on 1:30 with 12kg
• 10 rounds of :20 swings (14 swings) with 24kg

HRM said 350 calories

Good news, bad news

Good news = KBB workout #2 is in the books (400 calories burned)
Bad news = no running or swimming yesterday

Yesterday represented a pattern I need to avoid.  I skipped morning workouts because I was going to workout at lunch at Oracle.  Then I skipped workout at lunch because, well, that's what I do.  So in the evening it came down to going for a run or doing the kettlebell burn workout that was scheduled.  There wasn't time for both.  So I think I made the right choice and did the KBB workout.  But that's two days in a row of no running.  I'm feeling it.  Clancy is definitely feeling it.  So what did I do this morning?  Skipped the run because I woke up a bit late and then putzed around doing work kind of stuff.  I need to get back into that before work exercise habit.  It was good for me and it made me happier at work.  Tomorrow.

KBB workout (workout B): 

1. 15 minutes of clean and press ladders - done 1R, 1L, 2R, 2L, 3R, 3L.  Did this with the 12kg bell (the 16 kg wasn't happening).  Only put the bell down 2, very briefly.  I think I did about 10 rounds of this.  Was getting more challenging at the end but was absolutely doable.
2. 15 minutes of getup situps (6R, 6L) and reverse lunges (6 each side).  Also done with the 12kg bell. Pretty much went non-stop other than the up/down transitions between exercises.  I think I did 7 rounds.
3. 10 minutes of :20/:40 swings with the 16kg.  I should probably switch to the 24kg for these. 

By way of catch-up:  Yesterday's weight = 145.5.  Not surprising after the chips, salty stew and two glasses of wine dinner I had with Peter.  Or maybe it was the Ben and Jerry's that I had after that.  Disordered.  Completely.

Today's weight = 144.0.   So I'm not making any real progress on losing weight.  Or at least not making it quickly.  Hopefully I'll get back to the 143 level or even break into the 142's before end of the week.

Today is a Josue workout.  I'm still not feeling totally energetic so we'll have to see how it goes.  Hope to get at least 3 miles of running in as well.

Punk

That's how I feel.  I don't really feel bad, I just feel tired and heavy.  I made it through Tracy's swing class this morning but I was pretty content sticking with the 12kg bell through the whole thing.  No interest, nor to I think the energy, to try something more than that.  I've also had a low grade headache for the past couple of days.   It doesn't feel like sinus because its in the back of my head.  But it refuses to go away.

Yesterday I provided testimonials for Josue and Michele.  It made me realize how very lucky I am to have hooked up with Josue as a trainer.  I don't think I would have done the RKC without his encouragement.  I'm not sure I could have passed without his teaching.  I certainly would have less fun workout out without his guidance and encouragement.  And its unlikely that I would ever have gotten nutritionally sorted out if Josue didn't have a wife who does exactly that.  So just a moment of appreciation for them coming into my life.

And speaking of nutrition - I made it through yesterday with only a wee bit of non-compliance.  Specifically, I had two hard candies (one at work, one at home) and half an Indian cookie (from the PO snack bin).  It felt great to not rationalize or worry about the size of the indiscretions.  It was much easier to just not have them.  

Finally got Clancy out for a run around the block last night.  I just need to remind myself how much it means to her.  You don't have to watch her for long to know that it feels good and that its a highlight of her day.  And she's so much calmer in the evening after a run than she is when she's been cooped up and needs attention.

Weight this morning = 143.5

Dinner this evening with Peter Skinner at Reposado.  Hope to eat good stuff and stay away for the alcohol...

Start of a (hopefully) great week...

It's Monday again.  This one follows a great weekend, weather-wise.  I won't say it was an overall great weekend because, quite honestly, I wasn't feeling all that healthy for much of it.  I do, however, feel a whole lot better than I did last week and I'm hopeful that my recovery will be quick and complete.

I'm still quite proud of myself for doing the KB Burn workout on my own.  For whatever reason, most likely because of the "group workout" ethic instilled during my swimming years, I'm not very good at making myself workout at home.  I've got the discipline to get myself to a scheduled workout and work hard once I'm there but the initiative to do it at home, all by myself, hasn't been my strength. 

I'm less proud of rest of what I did yesterday.  The vodka tonic wasn't terrible.  The French Bread (leftover from last week then frozen) was completely unnecessary and probably a result of the VT.  The Almond Butter protein bar wasn't bad but it was followed by a peanut butter protein bar.  Still not bad.  The Lunchables that M&D left in the fridge was completely bad.  Wow.  Forgot how unhealthy packaged food can be - 3 litte bread rounds, some fatty "pepperoni" and some shredded cheese.  How does that pass for lunch?  The box said it was 300 calories - I'd much rather have veggies, chicken and an apple for those calories. 

This morning I had my workout with Josue.  I didn't think I was doing too badly but when he asked whether I was in the middle of a purification/detox, I guess I had to admit that I wasn't doing so well.  He had said something about "really easy" this morning but I was sweating like a pig and breathing hard.  So maybe I wasn't doing a peak performance.  But I finished it which was better than last Thursday's workout.  Small victories. 

Weight this morning = 144.5.  So I guess I lost about a pound last week.  Not great but not so bad given that I was sick (and didn't exercise) and M&D were here (which doesn't usually lead to healthy eating).  My goal for this week is to do

• Really clean eating (100% compliance for 90% of my meals)
• Drink water
• Workouts, KB Burn, Run and Swim (consistently, not obsessively)

Hopefully that will add up to a few pounds lost.

And I do need to think about when I'll do a purification/cleanse.  I'm not mentally there for it right now but it'd probably do me some good...

Day 1 (for real this time)

Today's Measurements:

Weight = 143.5
Chest = 37"
Waist = 30" (relaxed), 27" (sucked in)
Hips = 38"
Thigh = 22.0"
Love handles = 34"

Seems a bit more than last time. Maybe error in measurement due to the fact that I measured "blind" (didn't know last time's numbers while measuring) to be sure I wasn't influencing the numbers. BUT, since this is "day 1", I'm not going to dwell on it. Just accept it as fact and move forward.

I swam with Stanford Masters this morning. First time in at least 3 weeks. Today I swam a solid 3,000 meters. Didn't really feel bad. Didn't feel great and I definitely wasn't fast. But other than being cold, I could have continued on. I need to do some swimming during the week. If I can get wet 3 days a week, I should be able to get back in the groove pretty quickly.

Today is also the day that I start "My Kettlebell Burn".  Here is the workout on the agenda for today (week 1, day 1). 

1. The Get Up, Left and Right, start with your weaker side.  Perform 1-3 reps with a kettlebell thatʼs your 5 Rep Max for 15 minutes.  Rest only as and when needed.
2. Rest 2 to 3 minutes, then…
3. Alternate goblet squat and staggered stance 1 arm row (left and right starting with your weaker arm) for 15 minutes.  Do 5-6 reps per set of each exercise.  Rest only as and when needed.
4. Rest 2 to 3 minutes, then… 
5. 2 Hand Swings:  Week 1: 20 seconds of work, 40 seconds of rest

Depending how things go, I may even take Clancy around the block when I'm done.  Never did get that running done yesterday.

Time for a kick-ass week.

UPDATE:  Just finished day 1 of "my kettlebell burn".  I did the workout as described above and then finished it off with 10 sets of 10 snatches on :45.  As it turned out, I lost track of the number of get-ups but I went for just over 15 minutes (w/ 16kg), rested a few minutes, started the squat/row combo on 18:00 and did one round of 6/6/6 every 1.5 minutes (squatted with 16kg, rowed with 12kg), until 33:00.   Then 1 minute rest followed by 10 sets of 14 swings on the minute.  two minutes rest and then the snatches.  HRM said 52 minutes total, average = 119, peak = 153, 425 calories.  Good stuff.  Workout B on Wednesday.

Survived it...

I wasn't sure how this morning's workout was going to go given the cold I have.  I didn't do any exercise yesterday (after cutting Thursday's workout short).  But this morning I made it through the VO2Max workout AND the swing workout that followed.  I decided not to push my luck by doing my usual run afterwards.  Maybe, if I still feel good later today, I'll take Clancy for a trip around the block.

Weight when I work up this morning = 144.5.  I knew it would happen at some point that I would weigh more than I weighed the day before.  It happened this morning.  Disappointing but not demoralizing because I knew it would happen eventually and I had been surprised that yesterday was as low (wow, how things change) as it was.  I had a shake, a few cups of coffee and a good dump before workout and then I was back to 143.0 post workout.  I'll take it.  Tomorrow it's official weigh-in, measurements and pictures.  But today was the starting point for the month of May, which I hope will go better than April in the weight management department. 

Unwell

I've got a rip-roaring cold (ears, throat, nose, lungs) going.  I even had to give up on my workout early last night because I just didn't have it.  I'm not sure if I'll be able to do the Max VO2 thing tomorrow.  I hope I can - I hate to wimp out.  And that's what it would feel like even if it would be the wise thing to do.

Ate generally clean yesterday.  A bit of cookie (disordered eating) in the afternoon, some hard candies supposedly to soothe my throat and a few chips in the evening.  Weight 143.0 this morning.  Cool - but my "big jeans" are still on the tighter side.  But 1 pound per week would put me at 137 by June 11.  It'd also put me under 140 before Memorial Day.  I just have to remember that it is eating (or lack thereof) that is going to get me there.  Exercise will help but only so much.  And there is nothing you can eat that will make you thin - its what you don't eat that will make you thin.

Sniffle, sniffle

As yesterday progressed, my cold got worse and worse.  To the point that I considered going home from work early and couldn't even imagine working out.  Today I woke up feeling lousy and still don't feel very good.  But I'll be working out because I failed (or just didn't want) to call Josue and cancel this evening.

Weighed 144.0 this morning - in spite of eating chips, salsa and guacamole with dinner last night.  M&D wanted to go out for Mexican.  So we did.  I didn't NEED to eat the chips but I did.  Never thought I'd be thinking of 144.0 as a "good" number. 

Just gotta keep on with it - clean eating and exercise.  New plan is to start kettlebell burn on Sunday.  It wouldn't be smart to start something new when I'm not feeling well. 

The right direction, sort of

This morning I weighed 144.5.  That's going in the right direction.  Unfortunately, I also woke up with a cold and a sore throat.  I feel a bit achy.  If I hadn't had so many meetings at work today, I would have considered staying home.  It may keep me from working out as much as I might normally.  But I probably should try rest - it is just so not in my nature to do so.

Yesterday's eating, like most days this week, was a "B".  I had a few pieces of candy at work.  I had some chips (but not too many) at dinner time.  I munched one of Mom's "Chex Turtle Bars" (totally a candy bar disguised as cereal).  So I didn't do 100% compliance 90% of the time.  But I was much closer to 90% "good" overall. 

If I can keep up a pace of 1 pound weight loss per week for 8 weeks, I'll be where I want to be by June 23.  I just need to remember that I didn't gain the weight all at once (it took 9 months) and I don't need to lose it all at once.  Patience.  But I'll sure feel better within the next couple of weeks if I can get down to 141 or 142...

Back to the routine (sort of)

I've been back from India for 4 days now and I'm more or less back to the routine.  Josue workout yesterday morning.  Tracy's swing class this morning.  I probably would have gone for a run/swim last night if M&D hadn't been here but its easy to say that because they were here.  We'll never know.

This morning's weight was 145.5.  Disappointing but not surprising.  That's my real weight - it's not water or bloat.  Yesterday's eating was pretty good, although I did have to buy a salad for lunch because I didn't get myself organized enough to bring lunch.  Also, I just had to have the chicken salad sandwich (1/4 of sandwich), mini cinnamon roll and some chips and salsa as I shopped Costco. 

Ridiculism = just like airplane food, the stuff I eat when shopping at Costco doesn't count.

I don't like getting ready for work and knowing that I have very few clothes that will fit.  It makes me anxious and uncomfortable.  That's why it is definitely time to pay "real" attention to my eating again, not just eat the healthy stuff along with the unhealthy stuff.

Hope to run or swim this evening.  Not much excuse not to....

Monday, Monday

It's back to work for me this morning.  But first, my workout with Josue.

Never got around to my Kettlebell Burn workout yesterday.  Too much going on with Andy, Ann and the kids around and all.  I'll try to start on Wednesday of this week.  Will do pictures as soon as I can get them without drawing too much attention to myself - would be nice to get the mirror in my bathroom installed for this.

Eating yesterday was pretty good as long as you don't count the Gin and Tonics, the chocolate chip cookies and the tortilla chips. 

Weight this morning = 145.0.  I think this is the "real" starting point. 

Day 1 (I hope)

Sunday morning.  The day I said I would officially start My Kettlebell Burn.  It's only 7am but I'm feeling just a hint of procrastination and some excuses setting in.  "Mom and Dad are here.  Andy's family will likely be here later.  Where will I do the TGU's?  It's too cold out to go out and do the workout now.  I'll take pictures some other day."  I hope to power through, however, and get it done.  I'd also like to get a run and a swim in (tanning!). 

Yesterday was interesting.  It started with an eye opening weigh in.  147.0.  I don't know when I last saw a number that big on the scale.  Then a kettlebell workout.  I realize that I can be pretty tough when I saw the reaction of others, especially Mark and Tracy, to my being in class so shortly after such a huge trip.  Not everyone would do that. 

Eating was good except for the handfuls of Cheerios, Bailey's, Pumpkin Scone, and frequent "tastes" of nut butter.  Funny how I had so many exceptions and yet it felt like a "good eating" day.  I guess that means there is lots of room for improvement.

Yesterday also included a trip to Lululemon to see if there was anything I "need".  Didn't find anything that wowed me but I did have the opportunity (and I use that word with dripping sarcasm) to catch a look in a big mirror.  The muffin top is definitely in residence.  I was definitely disappointed to see the extra insulation but fortunately, I had a more positive reaction than I sometimes have.  I decided that I didn't gain it all at once and it isn't going to come off at once - just have to get on the right track and it WILL come off. 

This morning I weighed 145.0.  I never really thought that would look like a good number but it definitely does, compared to yesterday.  Because I've gotten sort of accustomed to my bigger size I might have looked in the mirror and thought I was "back".  But the daily weigh-ins are important and they make things real.  So today we start kicking some ass on the extra 8 pounds I'm carrying.

Because kicking ass matters. 

Saturday workout

warmup = 4 * 5R/5L
Vo2Max at :15/:15

• 10 sets of 8
• 8,8,9,9,10,10,9,9,8,8
• 10 sets of 9
• 8,8,9,9,10,10,9,9,8,8
• 10 sets of 10
• 8,8,9,9,10,10,9,9,8,8

5 minutes of snatch/transfer at 16 snatch per minute pace

• 5 * 1 minute of swing/snatch/transfer (8 snatches per minute)
• 3 * 1 minute of 2 snatch/transfer (12 snatches per minute)
• 3 * 1 minute of 4 snatch/transfer (16 snatches per minute)
• 2 * 1 snatch/transfer each side, 2 snatch/transfer each side....4 snatch/transfer (20 snatches per round)

147.0

I weighed myself this morning as part of my "get back on that horse" project.  I weighed 147.0.  That is the most I've weight in 4 years!  I had myself prepared for 145 but 147?  No wonder I feel fat. 

But maybe that's the shocker I need to make me realize that something needs to be done now.  This isn't me playing with degrees of leanness at this point.  It isn't just water retention or need of a dump.  This is real weight gain that needs to be reversed.  Starting today - immediately - not tomorrow when I start my kettlebell workouts.  And it starts with eating, because that's where the problem is.  My exercise is good enough.

So that's what we do.  We go back to the eating habits that got me down to 135 in the first place.  Eat every 3 hours, lots of veggies, some protein at each meal and very limited dairy, sugar, alchohol,  nuts, wheat etc.

Mine is a very big ass that needs to be kicked.

Almost home

One hour to go.
I’ve been sitting on this airplane for about 15 hours at this point and we’ve got about an hour to go until we touch down in San Francisco. It should be a good time to capture some of the things I’ve been thinking over the past day or so.
First off, I feel pretty much like dog meat right now. My body just is not accustomed to sitting for so many hours in a row. I did manage to get two miles on the treadmill before leaving Dubai but airplane food, drink and idleness (not to mention a ten hour time change) wiped away any positive feeling I got from that. Further, I feel fat – plain old too-big-for-my-jeans, legs-rub-togetherr kind of fat. I know its all relative and few people, if any would say that I am actually overweight. But I know how much more comfortable and confident I felt when I was lighter and by comparison I don’t feel good.

Earlier this week I mentioned that travel had made some of my bad food habits and behaviors more visible to me. After a full week of observing myself, I’ve come up with the following ridiculisms (“truisms that are clearly ridiculous”)

• Food consumed in an airport lounge doesn’t count
• Food consumed in an airplane doesn’t count (especially alcohol and sweets)
• Food consumed to be socially correct doesn’t count
• When eating at a buffet, taking a little bit of lots of different foods is somehow less fattening than picking a few things and having a meal
• Dessert from the buffet doesn’t count – especially when you have a little bit of almost every dessert option
• Exercise while travelling counts more than exercise while at home
• Drinking lots of water completely makes up for the other not so good eating
As I said, “ridiculisms”.
I’m looking forward to getting home and starting up the good habits that I will adhere to through out my Kettlebell Burn experiment. I would have liked to be able to say “get back to my good habits” but on observing myself for the past week, I think I no longer have good habits to get back to.
But I will get there…
Food so far today (because I don’t have my paper log nearby):
• 2 glasses of champagne and some nuts (do love the business class lounge)
• Fruit and yogurt, omelette, 1 piece of roti bread
• Twix candy bar and some dried fruit
• Roasted nuts and a glass of champagne
• Salad and mezze appetizer
• Beef, beans, mushrooms and polenta
• Fruit cobbler with ice cream

Connecting

I realized last night as I was eating my buffet food that I still haven't really made the connection between what (and how much) I eat and how much I weigh.  Yes, intellectually I know the two are very tightly related.  But I can eat a plate full of buffet food all the while thinking about how I'd like to lose the 5-10 pounds I've gained.  It seems that my brain still thinks that there are things I can eat that will make me thin.  Like if I eat lots and lots of this veggie I will be thin.  I just doesn't work that way and I need to figure out how to make that connection.

Speaking of the weight I've gained - I am going to have to weigh myself when I get home.  I've fallen out of the habit of weighing myself daily because I didn't like the numbers I was seeing.  So I told myself to take a few weeks off from that.  My thinking (flawed though it may be) was that I's somehow manage to lose several pounds so after a few weeks I'd weigh in and be happy.  The fact is that without that daily weigh-in, I tend to lose track of my goals (and the connection with all the things that will  help me achieve them).   So when I get home, I restart the daily weigh-ins.  Maybe not until Sunday, but definitely at that time.

Exercise is okay.  Ran 7.5km yesterday (Wednesday) and will run again this morning before packing up my stuff.  Actually, its been pretty good this week.  Exercise can be hard while travelling and I've done well.

Food on the other hand, no so well.  I haven't been logging what I eat because 1) its been buffet style almost every meal and there are just too many items to log and 2) I don't know what half of what I eat even is.  I plan to restart my logging exercise today, starting with breakfast.

And today I get to go home - back to my fridge full of veggies and my kettlebell.  I'm looking forward to starting the official part of the Kettlebell Burn on Sunday.

Awareness is key

Once I started noticing my attitude and behaviors about eating, there are a bunch of things I've noticed.  One key one is something I mentioned yesterday (or a few days back) which is that my behavior doesn't match that of a person who really thinks she is bigger than she should be (wants to be) and that I need to adjust me eating to match.  I eat more like a person who feels she has room to over-indulge at bit.  Witness the behavior at the dinner and breakfast buffets.  Rather than just picking some nice healthy, low-cal food I had to fill my plate and sample a bit of everything.  And those samples included stuff I shouldn't eat if I really want to lose a few pounds but would be perfectly okay if all I wanted to do was maintain.  I also engage in the mindless eating - picking a piece of candy because its there, not because I want it.  Admittedly, 100 calories probably doesn't matter alot but it does add up when done multiple times per day over a period of months. 

So I have to keep telling myself:

• I really am bigger than I want to be.  Not just somewhat but to the point that my clothes don't fit.  That's real.
• Its what you don't eat that makes you thin.  Eating a little bit of alot of things is still eating alot of things and won't make you thin.

Otherwise, had a good 7.5km run on the treadmill this morning.  One more day of clean running clothes, then I'm going to have to wash my clothes or do something really gross - wear something that was already sweaty once.  Yuck.

Made it to India

It wasn't easy but I'm here.  My flight had a pre-planned delay of 4 hours and then we sat in the plane waiting to pushback for another two hours.  I gather there was some issue with the air conditioning system that they needed to fix.  In the end, it probably worked out better that way because I had much less time to spend in the Dubai airport (business class seat drinking champagne is more comfortable than some random chair in the Dubai departure gate).

Got to the hotel and went immediately to the fitness center.  Didn't pass go, didn't collect the breakfast buffet.  Got in 10km on the treadmill.  I plan to do some naked body weight exercises and stretching this evening.  And yes, I mean really (almost) naked.  Its something that feels appropriate in a hotel room much more so than at home.  Interesting.

Had a few insights on the way over that I'll briefly share here (because I do need to get to the office). 

• I am "fat".  There is a difference between gaining some weight to go from really lean to just lean.  Did that, now I've gone beyond that.  I'm not lean anymore.  Ok - I'm not really fat either but I'm headed in that direction.  For real.
• My eating "habits" are more appropriate for someone who is messing around with degrees of lean-ness.  Noticed I had all sorts of "rules" like its okay to eat whatever is served on the plane, the calories won't count on a travel day, etc.  Those are fine rules when you really are lean but when you really do need to cut back (see above), they hinder progress.
• I have about 0% compliance to good eating habits.  Somewhere along the line I went from 100% compliance 90% of the time to eating good stuff 90% of the time topped off by some bad stuff 90% of the time.  The result is that about 0% of my meals are compliant/good/perfect (whatever you want to call it) and the non-meal eating is probably even worse.  Remember, there is nothing you can eat that will make you thin.  Its what you don't eat that makes you thin.

Now, off to the office where hopefully I don't have to kick any ass.

Waiting to depart

I'm sitting in my living room watching stuff off Tivo.  That's not where I'm supposed to be right now.  I'm supposed to be an hour or so into my flight to India (via Dubai).  Unfotunately, my flight is delayed by at least 4 hours.  So I'll be leaving for the airport in about 30 minutes or so.  I'm not sure how the trip will turn out.  At this point I don't even get to Hyderabad until 8:55am Monday morning.  And worst of all was that when I tried on my summer clothes, the pants weren't even close to fitting.  They fit so well last summer.  But then I guess that's why I'm doing this.

Today was an okay day.  I got going well and I had some momentum.  Until I found out about the flight delay at which point I had four hours to fill and nothing planned or needed.  So I ended up pretty much wasting the afternoon. 

This morning's workout was Max VO2 followed by swing class with Tracy.  This is one of the workouts that I'm unwilling to give up during my Kettlebell Burn experiment.  Not an issue for at least a week.  Workout looked something like:

5 rounds of 5R/5L warm-up


at :15/:15 - 5 rounds of the following
    8R, 8L, 9R, 9L, 10R, 10L, 9R, 9L, 8R, 8L working into rest on the 9's and 10's
    5 times 8 double snatch (3 times with double 8kgs, 2 times with double 20 lbs)
during class:
5 * 1 minute snatch transfer at 16 snatch per minute pace
5 * 5R/5L
4 * (10 double swing, 5 single snatch)
2 * (10 transfer, 5 single snatch)
2 * (10 transfer, 6 single snatch)
2 * (10 transfer, 7 single snatch)
4 * (10 double swing, 5R/5L snatch)
2 * (10 transfer, 5R/5L snatch)
2 * (10 transfer, 6R/6L snatch)
2 * (10 transfer, 7R/7L snatch)

Kicking ass matters.

In the beginning....

Today marks the first day of my new blog.  I've started this blog to track my progress through my variation of a program called "Kettlebell Burn".  I plan to officially start the program in about a week, after my trip to India.  I can't take a kettlebell with me to India so I will use this next week as a bit of a warm-up on both the blogging and the eating habits. 

A bit about me first (it is my blog after all):

I am a 49 year old female software executive who recently earned her RKC kettlebell certification.  I spent the 6 months leading up to that certification focused on passing it.  Prior to taking up kettlebells I was focused on running and swimming (competing in both).  Since passing the certification, my workouts have drifted and I've gained weight.  It has become clear to me now that I need goals and to keep my attention, those goals have to be bigger than "do 5 pull-ups".  They need to take time and have a path to completion.   Most importantly, they need to be a challenge.

So the goal I've chosen is my variation of "Kettlebell Burn" by Geoff Neupert.  Why that one?  It is the one I was looking at on-line (with my credit card out) when the mood struck.  Why a "variation"?  Well, because Geoff explicitly says to that no extra workouts should be added to his program but I know that I will be adding extra workouts.  I'm acknowledging straight up that I might be messing with his program and any lack of results that I have is my fault and my fault only.  BUT, I don't have many of the stressors in my life that he warns of (2.3 kids, alimony, mortgage payments) and I do have a social life built around physical activity, a dog that needs to go running to stay sane, a personal trainer that I simply will not give up and a whole bunch of time to fill so that I don't fill it with work.  I've trained long/hard at many times in my life and I know that I have a very high tolerance for training before I suffer any symptoms of over-training.  So I'm going to keep doing the things I love to do but take responsibility if it negatively impacts my progress. 

Other than the extra workouts, however, I plan to follow the program as written - for both exercise and eating.

As far as the blogging goes, I've started up this new blog because I just didn't feel like I was going to do it justice if I tried to log progress in my other blog (Sliding Toward 50).  First, I'm going to let this be a public blog which is a bit scary to me.  Second, I sort of try to keep the other blog from becoming a workout log, which means I often have little to say.  This blog will be a workout log - that is its purpose.  Don't look for anything profound to be said here.  I reserve that for the other blog although it rarely happens.  Finally, I'm not sure what will happen with this blog after the 16 week program is over.  The other blog has a beginning unassociated to this program and will stay around after the 16 weeks (well, 17 weeks if you count the warm-up) is over. 

So for my own purposes, here's the summary of what I'm planning (am I equivocating with the repeated use of the word "plan"?) to do:

• Kettlebell Burn workouts - 3 times per week starting the week of April 26
• Kettlebell Burn (PN actually) nutrition, with (paper) food log, starting today
• Blogging of progress at least once per workout (every day/every other day or so)
• Publicly (yikes!) posting weight and measurements bi-weekly starting April 25

Finally, my theme for this experiment is a phrase that Josue sent me before the RKC.  Quite simply it is that "kicking ass matters" and that is what I intend to do.